Save-the-Date: when to send and what to put on it
Save-the-date cards, when they make sense, what belongs on them and how far in advance to send them.
You have your wedding date, you have a rough idea of venue and style, but the official invitations aren’t ready yet? You’re in the classic “save-the-date” moment.
Save-the-dates are a small but practical pre-announcement: “Keep this date free, the real invitation comes later.” That sounds trivial, but it can be the difference between having your guests at the wedding or finding half of them on summer holidays.
Do you even need save-the-dates?
Not necessarily. If all your guests live in the same city and you send invitations six months in advance, save-the-dates are redundant.
They do pay off when:
- You’re marrying in peak season (May to September), competition with other weddings and holidays
- Your guests travel from different cities and need to plan trips
- You’re planning a destination wedding (abroad)
- Your wedding falls on a bridge day, holiday or school-holiday weekend
- You have many guests with children who have to plan around school
- You decided early to marry but the details (venue, programme) aren’t done
When to send save-the-dates?
It depends on how much travel your guests face:
| Situation | Lead time for save-the-date |
|---|---|
| Wedding in your hometown, everyone lives nearby | 4 to 6 months (or skip straight to invitations) |
| Wedding domestic, some guests travel from other cities | 6 to 9 months |
| Summer wedding with faraway guests | 9 to 12 months |
| Destination wedding (abroad) | 12 to 18 months |
Important: the official invitation still comes, about 6 months before the wedding, with all the details. The save-the-date doesn’t replace it.
What goes on a save-the-date?
Little, but thoughtfully. The key info:
Mandatory
- Your names (“Lisa & Tom”)
- Wedding date
- Location or region (“In Cologne” or “In the Sauerland”)
- A note that the official invitation follows (“Detailed invitation to follow”)
Optional
- Photo of you as a couple, makes the card more personal
- Exact venue address, if it’s already set
- Link to a wedding website (“More info at lisa-tom-wedding.de”)
- Hashtag for social media (“#LisaTomSaysIDo”)
What you can leave off
- Exact times (goes on the invitation)
- Programme (goes on the invitation)
- Dress code (goes on the invitation)
- RSVP, a save-the-date expects no reply
Rule of thumb: less is more. Save-the-date means blocking the date, not clarifying the details.
Digital or paper?
Both work. It depends on what fits your style:
Paper cards:
- Feel premium and festive
- End up on many guests’ fridges
- A bit pricier (print + postage, ~€1.50 to €3 per card)
Digital (email or messenger):
- Fast, free, sustainable
- Accepted by most recipients under 50
- Feel less ceremonial
Hybrid:
- Paper for important guests (family, older people, international)
- Digital for friends
Stylish design ideas
- Photo card: a nice shot of the two of you, with the date over it
- Minimal typography: just names, date and location, in a beautiful typeface
- Polaroid feel: a casual, personal image
- Vintage: older typefaces, muted colours
- Animated digital: a small video message via WhatsApp or an animated GIF
What matters: the style should fit the eventual invitation. If the save-the-date suddenly shows up in a totally different style, it feels disjointed.
Who gets save-the-dates?
An important rule: whoever gets a save-the-date also gets invited. Don’t send it “just in case” to people you’re still unsure about. Otherwise you create expectations you’ll disappoint later.
Specifically:
- Definitely invite: family, wedding party, closest friends, anyone with a longer trip
- Save-the-date useful: colleagues, everyone who lives further away domestically, anyone with children
- Not strictly needed: local friends you’ve already told in person
Common mistakes
Mistake 1: sent too late. A save-the-date three months before the wedding misses the point. Anyone who hasn’t booked summer travel by then would have made it with the invitation anyway.
Mistake 2: too many details. Most couples want to cram everything onto the card, programme, times, dress code. Leave it. Save-the-date is for blocking the date, not scheduling the day.
Mistake 3: style breaks. Sending a boho save-the-date followed by an elegant black-and-white invitation confuses people. Lock the style early and carry it through.
Mistake 4: only paper or only digital, without thought. Some guests respond better to paper, others ignore their letter box. Hybrid is often the best answer.
What Marrily takes off your plate
Save-the-dates are part of the guest list function in Marrily. You can decide per person: digital by email with a personalised link, or as a printable PDF card. Miri handles sending and tracks automatically who opened and who didn’t.
In your wedding checklist, the save-the-date task pops up at the right time, tuned to your wedding date and the share of guests with long travel. Miri suggests templates and you just fill in the content.
